So, I found out today that a few weeks ago, when my wife was saying she didn't know what to do for me for Christmas, and I said "well, you could make me this sweater," she was already working on making me a sweater. She's super fast, so she almost got them both done in time, but her mom's car got stolen, so she had to help out. Honestly, I kind of feel like a jerk, but she says it's cool, and she didn't mind at all.
The car actually turned up a couple of days ago. The radio and the exhaust are gone, and the tires and headlights have been replaced with crappy ones. So it's still driveable, but they're waiting to use it until the insurance dude checks it out. Her dad and brother are both mechanics, so it'll be cool, but it was still annoying.