I feel like fans create a worse stigma for this stuff than the actually games, products or bonus material itself....
Very true. The fans just need to stop deluding themselves and trying to excuse themselves for shit like this and just tell it like it is. I like sex, and I like sexy women. If I get branded as a pervert because society deems me so, hey, I'm not about to lie about my preferences - if I'm a pervert, I'm a pervert. Given, my preferences do not lean towards anime characters that look like 6-year-olds, but that's what happens. I can even understand the rationale behind "just because I look at anime drawings of little girls, doesn't mean I'm a real life pedophile." No, but it sure as hell makes you a fictional pedophile. I've had some asshole call me a 'prude' because of it; seriously, I'm far and away the last thing to come into anyone's mind when they think 'prude.' It'd be hilarious if it weren't so pathetic.
The problem isn't about liking sex or sexy women, on the contrary; enjoying sex is very healthy and is just human nature. There should be no moral panic over the outright depiction of sex in media. The problem with these types of games though and the whole Moe/Otaku subculture of Japan is the fact that its misogynistic and objectifies women to the point where they're nothing but sex slaves destined to serve any and every man. Now I understand that this is a cultural thing, but before anyone calls me out on being racist hear me out. Yes, it's a wide known fact that for centuries Japan and all of Asia really has been extremely patriarchal and misogynistic, but that doesn't make it right and it doesn't mean we have to condone it simply because of "cultural differences."
In the Middle East, they're still forcing women to cover themselves up and be ashamed of their bodies, and if a woman isn't a virgin or cheats on her husband then she can get stoned! Should we leave that alone because "its a different culture?" No we shouldn't! Whenever there's outright oppression of a group based on who and what they are we have to stand against it and try to change it for the better.
Now granted, Japan is ahead of the West in numerous other areas but women's rights is not one of them, they've actually always been behind in the West on that front. It's slowly changing, but the whole Moe/Lolicon craze is a manifestation of the centuries old, deep rooted sexism that is still very much prevalent in Japan and all of Asia. Hell, Asia is the leading continent in little girl prostitution and sex trafficking! In India and China, girls as young as 9 are being sold off as brides with no choice in the matter, as if they're nothing but a piece of property! With these sorts of things going on, suddenly the whole Otaku subculture doesn't seem so "harmless" anymore.
This is why its so creepy to us Westerners, because; say what you will about us but we've come a long way on women's rights issues and have generally always been very forward thinking on that, and quite frankly that's the right way to be! I think probably the best way to let Japan and all of the Eastern world know that we're not happy about their depiction of women is to boycott sexist products like this. Maybe that'll get them to finally wake up and realize that their backwards views on women may have been okay in the 12th century, but it doesn't fly in the 21st century!