I love the moment where I ask if someone wants a cider because I'm going to get one from the fridge, the person decides to not only tell me that they don't drink, also why they don't drink and also that my drinking this one lone cider makes me practically one with the animals, being unable to comprehend their superior intelligence. Then they have a smug look on their face like they are now the fucking Dalai Lama of wisdom.
Look, I was just being nice. I don't really want to give you one of my ciders, it's just a faux pas to not offer. I am aware drinking is bad for me, I have taken upon me, the seemingly Atlas type responsibility, to choose to have a cider once a week with my Sunday dinner.