BTW, science question before alla-y'all get back to your arts 'n crafts:
Are you ever aware of whether or not you can /smell/ in dreams?
Logging this for future reference.
[03:29] <Mesh> I think I've lost the ability to feel a sense of lack, or a sense of longing at lack, and that's preventing certain catalysts from catalysing.
[03:30] <Mesh> Actually that's very true in a lot of ways.
[03:30] <Mesh> So in lieu of having responses to actual loss, I need to construct something I never had that I can feel emotions towards never having had.
[03:30] <Mesh> Right.
[03:30] <Mesh> That would be the mental state I was in last year.
[03:30] <Mesh> That was useful.
Something I came up with on IRC last night. Seems pretty accurate.
Line 3's the weird one -- I already do that, or have been doing that, without being aware of it. Using sleep deprivation/caffeine/paranoiac mental fuckery/recreational dreaming, I can make myself very emotionally susceptible to things that I wouldn't, under normal circumstances, give a shit about. So now that I'm aware that I'm doing this for a reason I can probably toggle it off intentionally or unintentionally.
It's like those damn ASMR videos. You watch them, you get the ASMR response, whatever, but then you can condition yourself to get an ASMR response at... just looking at a video title, or anticipating the video, or whatever. I heard some dog pulling at a chain, earlier -- heard the cough at collar tautness, not the lead snap itself -- and expected it to be running at me, but it wasn't. Still freaked out. Still a conditioned response. It's dumb. It's tediously dumb.
<Brief shot of Sean Astin strapped to a truck>.