The girlfriend won't let me play video games, WTF!?

[Ivalice Alliance]

I know I don't know anyone on here but I have to thank you for talking to me about this and giving me your input on this situation.  I think I know now what I must do.....

[Annubis]

How old are the kids anyway?

[Bytor]

I know I don't know anyone on here but I have to thank you for talking to me about this and giving me your input on this situation.  I think I know now what I must do.....

Often the best decisions are the toughest, and while the gaming "addiction" may seem one of the big issues it appears it is really the tip of the iceberg in many, much larger issues...bad situation for everyone.

[Ivalice Alliance]

How old are the kids anyway?

3 years and the other is 18 months.

[Yoda]

Some good advice and thoughts in this thread.

All I can say is that I was in a relationship a few years back that last about 3 years. Year 1: pure greatness. Year 2: little problems surfacing. Year 3: Steel Cage Deathmatch with ladders.


I let my desire to want to be in love and be needed clouded my vision of what was actually going on. I was being someone I wasn't and trying to fit w/ someone that wasn't a match. I lost touch w/ my friends, not because she demanded it, I just let myself get carried away.

Point is, if it doesn't feel like a great match from the beginning, be it conflicting interests or lack of compromise on either side, it's probably not going to get better.

It doesn't have to be totally on you to give up your hobby. She said you don't, but then said what's more important: her and the kids or games? That makes it seem like she's not considering your feelings at all.

Also, you're 25, test the waters! 

[Ivalice Alliance]

The thing is, I have been more distant with my friends lately.  Maybe she has brainwashed me,lol :( ?

[Starmongoose]

I've been with my partner for three years now and I definitely have lost touch with a lot of friends. I think it's just what happens. You invest so much time and emotion into a meaningful relationship with someone, there isn't always enough left over for your friends.

[Yoda]

With my current babe I've become more in touch with my old friends, even though I now live further away.

Last piece of advice: look out for #1.

If you're not going to be happy then do something about it.

or if you go ahead and marry this chick and she makes you dump your collection.....
I CALL DIBS

[Ivalice Alliance]

With my current babe I've become more in touch with my old friends, even though I now live further away.

Last piece of advice: look out for #1.

If you're not going to be happy then do something about it.

or if you go ahead and marry this chick and she makes you dump your collection.....
I CALL DIBS

If you want my collection, you have about 700+ games to look forward too :)

[Vanguard]

Normally, I'd say approach her about compromising, but it doesn't seem like that is going to work in this situation.

If you asked her, "If I give up gaming, what will you give up?" what do you think the response would be? I don't think it will be pretty.

But the real question is: why should you have to give up something you love? What is she sacrificing for the relationship?

[Agent D.]

I have a better idea than this compromise crap. Tell her no.  What's she gonna do, dump you? If she breaks the relationship because you refuse to bend to her whims, she's a tool and she can eat a....can of fruit(?). There's no reason you should have to give up anything because of a relationship. Cut back, yeah sure, but drop entirely fuck that noise.

Now bear in mind my experience with relationships is non-existent (not because of unwillingness, just shitty luck I'd guess).. But I know a bum deal when I see one, and unless you're so devoted to her that giving up all the things that make you happy is worth it to stay with her, then I'd say there is at least one more fish in the water. Don't let anyone control you, that's the only thing you have going for yourself.

[Ivalice Alliance]

The thing is, this is my first actual relationship and maybe it's hard for me to let her go.  Is it that crazy to sit here and contemplate on leaving her because she won't let me play a video game?  I think not,lol :)

[msg]

Ive been with my GF 5 years, I have a daughter, and I play as many games as I like. Gaming is my main form of entertainment, its what I do with my spare time.
We never argue about it because its no different from reading a book or watching TV, its just a form of entertainment.
You're GF has lots of issues, personally I wouldn't put up with it, life is about been happy not arguing about things that dont really matter.

[Ivalice Alliance]

I told her that if you want me to stop playing video games, then you have to stop drinking and smoking.  She said her quitting smoking is too hard and it relieves stress.  I said well if you are going to smoke, then i'm going to continue playing video games.  Video games relieve stress too.  You know she is actually very pissed at me because I pre-ordered Duke Nukem Forever because it has nudity!?  I think i'm going to have to do the inevitable here and be smart.  She is very paranoid and has trust issues.  What I forgot to mention is that she has been married twice, the last marriage was from being cheated on but the one before it, she was mean to him, kinda makes me feel bad for that guy.  No wonder he up and left her,lol.  Maybe it's a good thing this is happening only four months into the relationship because I could be saving years of pain.

[Vanguard]

It's a good thing this is happening only four months into the relationship because I will be saving years of pain.

Fixed.