Cunnilingus and BRAAAAINS
Monday, October 16, 2002

Hmmm. Silly people, my last intro wasn't directed at anyone in particular, especially not Square. It was moreso directed at the general confusion that something like Square news didn't seem to have a very clear stance on whether it was true or not - regardless of who I talked to. For now I'll just live with the fact that the sequels just aren't in progress right now, regardless of... whatever their status was in the past.

And I'll also point out that Q&A columns are done differently everywhere and really can't be compared. Anyone who takes our sarcastic comments that seriously need to lighten up, or /something/. With that said, I tend not to post what few flames I get, because they're not something people want to be reading here. If they want that kind of thing, they'll head to the message boards.

Plus, I wanna keep the focus on games around here. And anime, if the subject comes up. ;P

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Rare games? Probably.

hey liz

in the last column, some nameless person said europe didnt get suikoden or suikoden 2 which is a load of crap because i live in europe (england) and i have both games. my suikoden 2 manual is half in french and half in german which isnt of too much use to me cos i dont speak much german or french so they must have been released in central europe as well as england. According to a english videogame shop suiko3 was supposed to be out end of october but has been put back to start of december.

my most wanted rpgs are:
- Suiko3 (do i have to explain)
- Xenosaga (cos i never played xenogears cos of square-europe arggh)
- Star ocean 3 (Unlikely it'll come out over here though)


Hmm, I did not know that. Of course, I don't have much of an excuse for not knowing, because, well... I don't live in Europe. (Wow, really?!) The European date's not quite announced, so I'm pretty sure that's not what you're talking about, as I don't think the European version will even make December. (And I'm sure that what you read might have been a misread of the US version, whose date has actually been pushed UP from end of October to... next Tuesday. Heh.) Too bad, cuz it would make an awesome Christmas present, too. As for I and II, I bet that even in Europe they're a tad difficult to find nowadays. At least you guys weren't deprived of ALL the good games, ne?

...Now those manuals sound more interesting than the half English half French ones I get here in Canada. (Or the all French ones, for that matter, like the first shipping of FFIX came with.) Although it makes me wonder why the heck you didn't even get an English one...

Me? Oh, I'm allergic to cats.


Just what the heck do have against my cat, woman!? He's one of the most friendly, softest, prettiest, kitty cats on the pla...<_<...>_>... *eruhem* yeah, anyway.

Let's see, what games am I looking forward to in the next six months... Well of course the Legend of Zelda. Why? Uh..well, it's the new Zelda!
Metroid Fusion and Prime. I'm actually looking forward to Fusion a bit more. Not to sure how I feel about the first person perspective in Prime yet.
Xenosaga Ep.1. (though I still haven't had the chance to finish 'gears yet).
And since I liked the first two so well, Wild Arms 3.

Well, That about does it. (I must go and finish building my gummie ship, which looks like my cat...sort of).


Well, I've had the weirdest letters about cats, toenail fungus, belly button lint and all sorts of interesting things... it's frightening sometimes. Some mornings I'm afraid to even open my e-mail - though at least I'm reading them in the morning instead of before bed. Imagine the nightmares I'd have then.

All right, anyway, again, I love those choices. I'd say I'm looking to Metroid Prime more, and that I've gotten used to the whole first person thing, but that's only because I've played it at E3. Fusion isn't exactly far behind either, what with the intriguing storyline (WTF? Metroid with a story?) and Super Metroid feel and all.

Also, since Xenosaga isn't out until February at the earliest, you have plenty of time to beat Xenogears. Awesome story, especially on the second disc. How can you possibly pass it up?

I know that I didn't want letters about cats, but if your gummi ship really seriously looks like a cat, I have to see that. :P

Roy's, um, your boy.




Pics? What kind of pics? If you mean SSBM pics, you can take all sorts of snapshots in Camera mode. What's sad is that I have uh... 7, 8 Roy snapshots? Yes, I know it's sad. But uh... I have 5 Kirby ones! And Link, and Marth, and Zelda... yeah, well... I was bored, okay?!

Or would you perhaps mean Fire Emblem related Roy stuff? Well, you can take a look at the Pics section and look under GBA for Fie Emblem: The Sealed Sword and see some screens, or a Roy illustration. I personally like the illustration much metter than his in-game profile pic. Heh.

Lastly, if you want to see fanart... you'll have to wait on that. Due to several people asking me where to find pics of Marth/Roy (as apparently I'm now the resident Fire Emblem fangirl in a few corners of the Internet... ;P), I'm compiling a list of URLs to Marth and Roy fanart scattered across many Japanese websites. Just note that when I do post this list of URLs, most in the Japanese fanart/art community don't like reuse of fanart without permission. Or, at all. ;P Doesn't mean you can't DL them and save them to your HD though.

You didn't eat your cat for dinner, did you?

Hi Liz!

Since you're discouraging any emails about cats, I won't mention why I don't have a cat. And what exactly do you mean by *real* food?

I'm guessing that you're learning Japanese as an autodidact (no, I'm not throwing big words around for the heck of it). I'd like to learn but I've yet to find a good method. How are you doing it, or how do you suggest it? My mom's a native Japanese speaker but she says she can't teach me.

Just to keep this a somewhat RPG-related question, is Squaresoft using originated IPs to see if FFXI players are really from Japan or people like me who want to play a Japanese game out of the U.S.? And are they letting people out of theU.S.subscribe to PlayOnline to play FFXI?

Robert James Funches

Nah, I've got no audio-related Japanese learning resources except for other people who are trying to learn the language. Right now I'm attempting to learn vocabulary, sentences, conjugation and uh... reading Kanji. Yeah, I know, sounds like a lot at once, and it IS, but I have to start somewhere, right?

Real food, to me, means more than just eating cream of mushroom soup and microwaved popcorn for lunch and dinner, respectively. Yes, I can have a very crappy diet sometimes. Not that this is anything new. Now, if only I could eat more normally...

From the looks of it, FFXI is tightly restricted to Japanese players only. I'm not sure how they keep tabs on who's playing in Japan or not, though IP address is the most logical answer to that. Looks like you'll have to hold out until the US release, whenever that happens.

I'm sensing a commonplace here.

Hmm. You need letters. Here am I to provide with one meaningless jumble of words. Games coming out that I look forward to... that's a tough one. I want to say Xenosaga, Suikoden 3, and .hack. That's my top ones riiiight there. Now for the why part I guess.

3. Suikoden 3. I loved the first two games. Suikoden 1 was a blast because it was something different. It also seemed to fill the void left by that most vile of Square betrayals, called Final Fantasy 7. You Cloud lovers make me so nauseous... he wasn't anything but a wussy who 'reinvented' himself in some other guys image. We tend to call that type of guy a loser around these parts :P. Anywho, back to gaming goodness. Suikoden 2 was absolutely fantastic. The music was awesome, and I really enjoyed that game for Jowy. I mean, damn, that kid had some serious problems that made for an interesting plot in my opinnion.

2. .hack. Come on now. This is kinda like Valkyrie Profile, or the psx Star Ocean (which I will get to shortly). It's different. It doesn't involved Disney or Square (thank god). It's a game with in a game. I'm a BIG fan of RPGs that have stories that play out like a really good movie or anime. It drives and compells me to finish it, then tempts me to keep it forever and forever, even if I never play it again (RE: Phantasy Star 4. Whipped that game 4 times, and it now comfortably lays stashed away from my trade-in-whoring roomates). I'm so psyched for this game. And then they go and tell me I have to wait until January. It better be darn good, or heads will roll.

1. Star Ocean 3. Damn. That games looks so nice. Nicer than my girlfriend in a skirt. And if it plays like the last one (or... ... better...) then all it needs is a more polished story, and I'm hooked like a junkie. The previous game was so much fun to play though that I didn't really care about any of its flaws according to other people. In fact, I tried playing that game on its uber difficult setting. Never before was I served up a helping of my own posterior like that; though I pray that it never happens again, it was nice to seriously be pwn3d in an RPG. Almost gave me flashbacks to Shining Force or the previously mentioned Phantasy Star 4 (which beats the shnot out of any FF game you would bring before it).

And here's a question I've been dying to ask: what's with video game plots nowadays? Specifically RPGs. It's starting to feel like a string of cliched stories one after the other. I mean, I know that there's really nothing new under the sun; but sometimes I think the writers could find a different approach to it, ya know? Like, how come I can't play an RPG where the point of the game is to eradicate the planet and the millions of roachlike human beings who stand in the way of total domination and annihilation? That'd be a pretty cool story to sit through. Not very morally encouraging, but still... let's face it. Valkyrie Profile and that whole Ragnarok (re: You can't do SH*T to stop the world from going to hell) was a really neat twist. Did I mention that I really like that game? And Phantasy Star 4? Ok, I'm sorry, I'll go away now.


Games that played out a lot like anime... was I the only one who felt Xenogears played out like such? I do like games that pull it off well. A game like Metal Gear Solid is so movie-like to me, especially with the music and all.

And oh my God, I love you, Kool-Aid person. You just echoed my feelings on Cloud, perhaps the most overrated main protagonist in gaming history. Not only was there that whole Zack thing that you mentioned, but even when it came to women, Cloud was just... a bit more than your average clueless male. Remember the date with Aeris? "I want to meet you." "But I'm right here." "But I want to meet... you." "...?" Please tell me that you remember that. That made me laugh, or roll my eyes the first time that happened. I forget which.

Yeah, .hack has a really fascinating premise... which is why it was one of my favorite titles at E3. I'd really like to see the anime though, as apparently the game as been pushed back to coincide with the airing of the anime on North American TV, or some such.

...Actually, that would be a really fun game to play. I agree that you'd have to have a low morale to really enjoy that kind of game, but how many games let you be the villain? I mean, come on. Even when it seems like everything possible has been tried, developers are always going to find something new and different, or at least put a new and different twist on things. Whether it always works is a whole other story.

Pow Pow.. huh?

Hey hey Liz

What games am I looking forward to? Well, like everyone else, Suikoden III. I really hope that it gets released in Europe. I finally managed to get a copy of the 1st Suikoden and it is brilliant! Ok, so I still prefer the second one but that's beside the point. I just think that it's a great series and hopefully the third installment is as good if not better than the previous two.

Ok, second game I'm looking forward to is Kingdom Hearts. When I first heard that Square and Disney were going to make a game together I was excited and couldn't wait to see how it would be done. Of course I naturally thought that seeing as it was Square then something quite decent should come out of it and luckily it looks like it has. Now I just have to hope that it comes out before my birthday (yep I am completely penniless, woe is me). Somehow though I don't think it will get released in November. Games seem to have a habit of appearing much later on the shelves than the companies originally said they would so I'm thinking maybe December or January.

Well those are the main two. I have been reading about .hack and I've got my fingers crossed for a European release. Here's hoping.

Bye bye

Pow Pow Parn

Well, as I've said before, now I know both Suikodens came out in Europe, so... oops. And III is confirmed, but apparently there's no date. So, you Suiko fans over there can rejoice.. some more, that is. With .hack, it's really hard to tell though, since it's a new title/series and all, and I don't know if Bandai has given thought to a European release or how well it would do. Heck, has Bandai released games in Europe before? :P

And finally, I can tell you from my measly three hours of play that Kingdom Hearts will definitely be worth the wait. Get ready to deal with a real-time action based battle system though, and the game otherwise isn't a walk in the park itself either... from what I've seen, anyway. Of course, even if it comes out after your birthday, can't you just ask for cash for your b-day and get KH when it's out?

And here I was expecting real bribery...

Liz, let me win Suikoden 3. Please? I'll be your best friieeenddd! ;__;

Also, don't forget to come up with a character for WanderingWord!

-xeria, who is listening to Happy Boys and Girls

Yes, mother. I'm bad at creating characters. Not that you'd know, since I never talk about any of mine, and that's a deep dark secret we shall leave buried in my past. Don't you have one of those character generators handy? A la D&D?

I thought I was your best friend anyway, so did you lie to all those people? Did you? *weeps*...

Closing Thoughts

Well, I'm half an hour overdue for bed, soon to be 45 minutes. Whoops. So go enter our Suikoden III contest if you haven't done so, and maybe write me in the meantime. Entertain me with stories about toenail fungus your recent gaming adventures. Or, not.

~ Liz, who... uhm, hopes not to dream about Red Dragon tonight. (letters@rpgfan.com)


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Sunday, July 22
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Digimon Story: Cyber Sleuth • 3pm PDT/6pm EDT

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Octopath Traveler • 5:30pm PDT/8:30pm EDT

Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Sleep • 2:30pm PDT/5:30pm EDT
Octopath Traveler • 5:30pm PDT/8:30pm EDT

Final Fantasy IX • 3pm PDT/6pm EDT
The Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel (Speedrun) • 6pm PDT/9pm EDT

Octopath Traveler • 5pm PDT/8pm EDT

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